Making Hard York of Things

So here we are. FA Cup Quarter Final day! 90 minutes from the Semi-Finals and a game at Wembley. Unfortunately, it's got absolutely bugger all to do with us given Mr Wenger's lot unfairly nudged us out by scoring more goals than us a couple of weeks back. And since then, we've instead been slogging it out on the road with trips to each end of the country to the likes of Torquay & Barrow.

I Left my Guts to Barrow

Do you know that I was beginning to believe that Sutton's consecutive run in the GM Vauxhall National Conference without a clean sheet was going to go the distance. It seemed that I'd be telling my mini-dukes of the great heroics of when Sutton beat Gateshead 9-0 back in September 1990. And how it was the last time we'd stopped the oppo from scoring away from home.

Isn’t it good, no its BOREham Wood!

The title for this blog is inspired by The Beatles’ “Norwegian Wood” for those who are of an outstanding musical intellect like me!  So let’s begin by getting the past events out of the way. It was only a week ago that we had hosted Arsenal, yes that’s Arsenal Football Club in the Fifth Round of the FA Cup.

Double Tourque

Well thank fuck the media circus has finally fucked off and left town. Now it's time to get back to some sort of perceived normality. Especially considering that we seem to have slipped down the table somewhat a little bit of late. And what better way than to celebrate our return to boring old league action, but with a wealth of typically Gandermonium-mentality dick jokes!

The Wengerbus Is Coming!

After the glamour and non-stop length of the M1 excitement that was Guiseley away we thought we'd put our feet up this weekend, have a quiet one and play someone a bit more low key than a little town a few miles north of Leeds. Y'know. Someone like, I dunno, Premier League Arsenal?

Indecent Proposal?

This is something a little unusual for us. An attempt at being serious. It's not a practice we're particularly big on if we're honest. However, sometimes you just have to take a deep breath and be adult for a change I suppose. So here goes...

Emmerdale Farm

It's half seven on a Sunday morning, and one of my phones goes off. Before I know it, the low tones of the Red Army Choir are filling the room. "Why did I set my alarm?" I begin to think to myself as I shuffle off to point Percy at the porcelain. Suddenly a top secret WhatsApp message comes through from Southampton Steve. "Running late, pick you up at 0845hrs".

There's Always an Alan

Have you ever heard the phrase: "If I didn't laugh, I would cry". Well, if you hadn't, you have now. Yes readers I'm laughing. So much so, that I'm about to start having a coughing fit. So, I hear you ask, why are you laughing? Or am I actually crying? Or more than likely, you're thinking what the fuck am I going on about.

Not Cheap, Not Cheerful

When a small outfit like ours finds itself in the spotlight, it's easy to get carried away with things and start living it large like them there big Premier League charlies. And why not, you're in the papers all the time and on the telly every 5 minutes. So you can very easily get all Dom Perignon and Suites at the Ritz when the old can of Tennents and a single room overlooking the bins at Croydon Premier Inn are more our sort of style.

Eye of the Storm

After the madness that was last weekend, we now enter the eye of this FA Cup storm and the chance to enjoy a period of relative calmness to catch out breath & take stock of what the hell has happened over the last couple of weeks before we once more have to batten down the hatches and find ourselves buffeted by forces we don't fully understand nor can fully control. That or it could be like that bit in the movie 'The Day after Tomorrow' where everyone freezes to death instantly. Metaphorically speaking of course....