Toilet Duck

As a god-fearing atheist Easter is probably my favourite of the religious holidays currently on offer although I still don’t understand why it is held on totally random dates or some of the highly strange licensing/shop opening hours that it throws up. As well as signalling the potential start of some warmer weather and longer days Easter also tends to be pivotal in terms of what matters most – the footballing calendar.

Its A Long Way Back to Epsom

Just when you think you are having an excellent weekend, something always goes wrong. For us boys this weekend, it was once again a 90 minute performance from the lads on the pitch that seemed to hark back to the anguish and torment of last year. There seems to be a running pattern of not being able to string a set of decent performances together.

Squid & Sprouts

To be brutally honest, if you're a regular visitor to this particularly idiotic corner of the interwebs, you'll be fully aware of the sort of season we are currently enduring here at Sutton United FC. So if you're a bit short on time at what is after all a somewhat stressful and hectic time of the year, I'd suggest skipping the rest of this. Mainly as it'll be nowt you've not already bloody read several times before.

The Wrong Bookend

With a puff of smoke, the wheels of our plane land at Gatwick. The time is half past two, twenty minutes later than expected. For the past two days we've away doing what the Gandermonium Firm does best. But we won't be discussing any of that little trip here, we'll be leaving that little ditty for another time (soon!). Lets just say that over the course of two days we were considerably hung over and found ourselves considerably poorer at the end of it.

All Things Brighton Beautiful

Something happened at work this week that could sum up the strangeness of this member of the Firm. After two fellas couldn't work out if on Wednesday if it was St George's day or not, I simply remarked that of course it is, didn't they know? St George's day is always three days after Hitler's birthday and everyone knows that!

I'll have a Brighton on the rocks please Guv!

It’s that time once more. Yes I’m back after a slight absence from Gandermonium over the last couple of weeks to bring you this weekend’s FA Cup fixture away at Whitehawk. Well seeing as its Friday night, I’d best get words to paper prior to the game, as I think come Sunday my body and brain will be in two different places,. That’s a given seeing as we are heading south this Saturday, down to the sunny coast of Brighton. So before my body and brain crumble into pieces, let's get started.

Stand & Deliver

Same place, different face.

So after missing the Concord game on Bank Holiday Monday, cause ‘er in doors wanted to spend some quality time up Town, I’m back to cover our next home featured presentation so the Duke can relax and do what he does best. Drink and bellow out his trademark saying of "Justice" across the Lane. So whilst you all have been enjoying yourselves during this short working week, things have taken Juan by surprise in the world of Office Politics within recent days.