Red Card Roy

Right, let me tell you about me, Roy McDonough and Sutton United. Stick with this as you wouldn't have got this review, or Totts addition to the Gandermonium roster of star writers, if it hadn't been for being forced to haul the memory back fifteen years to try and back up an anecdote I was trying to roll out on the Amber Planet website.

Justice

I'm sorry what was that? I didn't quite get it? Our support is fuckin' what? Well I have one word for y'all.....JUSTICE!!!!!

Well here we have it, the replay of our FA Cup match against 'emel 'empstead which on Saturday ended in a 3-3 draw. I suppose really that it will be fair for me to comment on that game because for the neutral it was a crackin' game with goals, controversy and entertainment to last them at least a week.

Euston, Euston, Euston...

So Friday evening, and the text message from the Editor In Chief was received. Get yourself to Euston for the meet, and tickets will be sorted from there!

An early wake up call for myself, as I was staying at the Guvnors Gaff down in Thames Ditton. Now, the misses had mentioned that she had indeed quite fancied watching a game of football, and seeing what we all get up to come Saturdays. So was that a wise decision, for her to come along, and witness the unadulterated idiocy. She seemed at first extremely game to come along, so I was indeed warned by others that this was probably not a good idea. Well, Saturday morning, she decided to drop out, a little sigh of relief.

I Am Zlatan Ibrahimovic

A couple of moths back, I finally caved and bought myself one of those not-so-new fangled Kindle wotsits. Now, previously I'd grumpily said I'd never bother as I preferred books and turning real paper pages, plus I never needed to have more than 1 book on me at a time, but then I had to re-evaluate my stance. The main reason being that a series of novels I've been following for ages has suddenly started releasing little spin offs in e-book only format and worst of all, they're referring to the events in them in the main printed time line. So, under duress and wanting to know what the hell was going on, I gave in. And now, much to her indoors amusement, I'm all Kindled up.

Love Thy Neighbour. But not those c**ts!

That title was suggested to me by my new neighbour, and don't you worry kind sir I will be around to get a cup of sugar just as soon as you move in.

Well that's another week closer to the end of the season and what has happened? Nothing! Absolute bupkis! Totally forgettable! There was an England game up at Wembley on the Tuesday night that saw the boys qualify for Rio 2014. But I missed the game as I was next to the Post Office tower at the University of Westminster.

Wheretoisthat? - One from the archives

So, it's October and we're already back to rummaging around in the basement through all our old files looking for some filler to keep you our dear readers happy following a postponement. Marvellous. Still, it could be worse, you could have been me (horrible thought I know, but bear with me) today and found out the match was off just as your train to the south coast was pulling out of bloody Havant. And you've only got a really fucking expensive one way ticket in your pocket as you were getting a lift home.

Bread & Dripping Pan

What do we do with a drunken supporter? What do we do with a drunken supporter? What do we do with a drunken supporter? Especially when he has lost his shoes!

Yeah that's right someone nearly lost their shoes on the trip back home last night. But we will deal with that later because we have the magic that is the FA Cup to get through first.

There's a hole in my back, dear Liza, dear Liza,

Now tell me, is it wrong to dream of Bacon Noodles? Or is it wrong to stumble around Brighton at night with a skull face mask on? How about being photographed hanging outside an adult 'Boutique' emporium?
Well that was all last week, this week is all about Langney Sports Eastbourne Borough!

So where do we start then?